The Real Reason You’re Not Getting What You Want

I’m going to keep this simple, cuz I like simple. Have you ever hopped into the car and said, “I’m going to go visit my friend Samantha in Idaho today. I’ve never driven to her house, in fact, I’ve never been to Idaho, but I know she lives somewhere in Idaho and I’m gonna just drive till I find her.” ???? If you have done that before, how did that turn out?

Started with a good intention, a good idea. Maybe you haven’t seen her since college. Maybe you imagined a grand reunion with coffee on the back porch in the sunrise, or tea at sunset, looking out over the fields, reminiscing about old times, slowly watching the golden light of day burst into the starry night of a clear, crisp sky. Breathing in the fresh air of the evening and the laughter of your good friend Samantha. Sounds awesome doesn’t it? (Now, I kinda wish I had a friend names Samantha in Idaho!)

But, sad day of the world, you left without a plan. You left without any specifics on which roads to take or which turns to make. Sure, a good drive like that is pretty fun….. IF YOU DON”T CARE WHERE YOU’RE GOING….. if you didn’t have that lovely vision in your mind already of where you wanted to be.

Having that vision in the first place is HUGE. Where is it that YOU WANT TO GO? What is it that you want to have? A life without debt? Money saved up for a down payment on a house? How about an ass that fits into a pair of jeans instead of baggy sweat pants? New paint on your bedroom walls? A vegetable garden in your backyard next year? A specific skill set that will help you advance your job or career?

Where do you see yourself in a year from now? Picture it. Is it a depressing picture or one that ignites excitement in you? Having dreams and goals can sometimes be overwhelming. Let me tell you a little secret, I like to treat it like a game sometimes. And here’s how I play:

Whether it’s a problem I need to solve or a goal I want to accomplish, or an intention I want to realize, I get really clear on what it is. I want to go visit my friend Samantha in Idaho! So I get really detached and business-like about how I’m going to do that. I know I won’t get there unless I give attention to my intention. I break it down into specifics. What time am I going to leave, how long does it take to get there, what is the destination address for giminiy-cricket’s sake! Now, which roads and turns will I take, will I stop overnight, what will I listen to on my drive, how much gas will I need.

Quality is never an accident; it is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, intelligent direction and skillful execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives.

William A. Foster (US Marine)

This may sound too scripted (anal) to you, but this is what I’m trying to tell you: the REAL REASON YOU DO NOT HAVE WHAT YOU WANT IS BECAUSE THE POWER IS IN THE DETAILS.

If you want something enough you need to drill it down to the step by step, day by day, minute by minute, until each fucking step takes you RIGHT to Samantha’s door in Idaho!

I’m not saying we or I want to live every aspect our lives this way. No, that’s no fun! However, if there’s something you want that you haven’t given this kind of attention to, then the real reason you don’t have it is because you haven’t put a HALT to the default. Without attention to your intention, you WILL, by default, wander into the same old weeds, the same old procrastination, only peering through the clutter at your goal in the far off distance, only because you neglected the tools and details right here, in you, at your disposal, if you will just make a plan.

It is the little things that make the big things possible. Only close attention to the fine details of any operation makes the operation first class.

J. Willard Marriot (founder of Marriot Hotels)

Recommended for helping you take specific action for specific results. I like this trusty, simple calendar with daily pages for listing out my day to day actions for a goal I want to attain. Pssst, I like short term goals that build on the big ones! Helps me see my progress quicker, and encourages me. When I accomplish one, I move on to the next, so I don’t feel like I have to be striving to accomplish them all at once, that’s too overwhelming for me. This one is so cute, and under 10 bucks!

2020-2021 Planner – Academic Weekly & Monthly Planner with to-Do List, 8″ x 10″, July 2020 – June 2021, Thick Paper with Marked Tabs + Holidays + Twin-Wire Binding – Swan and Floral
I love it cuz it’s not too big and not too small, and it has weekly and monthly pages. There’s more patterns and colors to choose from, if you don’t like swans. 😉